Penny Stones Blog
Archive for the ‘interpersonal skills’ Category
Friday, August 6th, 2010
Last month, I had the pleasure of attending the Phi Mu National Convention in Phoenix, AZ. It was an impressive event with even more impressive women! I had a fantastic time. I was asked to give a workshop on conversation skills and I have to say it went even better than I had hoped.
Phi Mu Foundation Luncheon
During lunch, each of the 550 attendees received a Penny Stone and we used them in the workshop I gave afterwards. The highlight for me was when I asked the ladies to ask their partner a typical icebreaker: “Where are you from? What’s your major? or How are you?” The room felt flat. Then I asked them to ask their partner a Penny Stones question. The room lit up! There was laughter, animation, and they didn’t want to stop talking. One of the ladies turned to me a said, “These things really work!”
Tags: communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, ice breakers, icebreakers, Penny Stones
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Friday, June 4th, 2010
My daughter came home with this great little sheet on communication skills: Seven Blocks to Communication
Here are seven things NOT to do when you want to communicate well. They block communication in a number of ways. They prove that you are not listening.
- Fidget. Play with your hair and clothes, twiddle your fingers, swing your leg or tap your foot.
- Don’t look at your partner. Look around the room, at the clock, or anywhere else. Don’t have eye contact with your partner.
- Interrupt. Ever time your partner starts talking, break in with a question or statement.
- Ask questions. Lots of them. Every time your partner starts talking, ask a questions, such as, “Why did you do that?” or “Why do you feel that way?”
- Criticize. Tell your partner all the tings that are wrong with his or her ideas, clothes, hairs, friends.
- Disagree. Every time your partner says something, disagree. Tell your partner that he or she is wrong.
- Give advice. Every time your partner starts talking, make a suggestion. Pretend to know a lot more than your partner does.
Tags: children, communication, communication skills, conversation, first impressions, good listener, interpersonal skills, listening skills
Posted in Conversations, communication skills, interpersonal skills, listening | 1 Comment »
Friday, May 21st, 2010
Here are some rules to go by when mingling:
- Most conversations = a few minutes
- Use information you’ve heard to change topics
- Optimum mingle time = 10 minutes
- Keep eye contact while the other person is talking. You can look around the room while you have the floor.
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, first impressions, interpersonal skills, parties, tips
Posted in Conversations, Small Talk, communication, communication skills, conversation starters, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills | 10 Comments »
Thursday, May 20th, 2010
Nonverbal communication makes up over 50% of a person’s message, so it’s good to be aware of what your face is saying (even if it’s not what you mean):
Open face (makes positive impression) – makes eye contact, gives feedback, shows curiosity and raises eyebrows to show interest
Closed face (makes negative impression) – frowns, purses the lips, avoids eye contact
Coughing or sticking the tip of your tongue out through closed lips or both mean you disagree or don’t like what you’re hearing. If someone is doing these while your’e talking, you may want to change the subject.
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, first impressions, interpersonal skills, nonverbal communication, talk
Posted in Conversations, communication, communication skills, interpersonal skills, listening | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, May 19th, 2010
If you’re like most people, the thought of entering a room full of people you don’t know and mingling with them is not comforting. Most people get a least a little nervous when they meet someone new. Here are three things to keep in mind the next time you’re meeting new people:
- Nervousness = excitement
The feelings of being nervous and being excited are virtually identical physically. When you start to feel nervous, tell yourself you’re excited. In a little while, you will be.
- Most people are as eager as you to establish rapport.
Everyone is a little uneasy with introductions. So you can count on grace being given if you mess up or forget someone’s name.
- 90% of all people are afraid to walk into a room of people they don’t know and mingle.
It’s always nice to know you’re not alone. In fact, you’re just like everyone else!
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, first impressions, ice breakers, interpersonal skills
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Wednesday, May 12th, 2010
- Most people wait for others to make eye contact first, to smile first, to talk first, and to issue invitations first.
- Socially successful people actively work to bring others into their lives. They start conversations and they issue invitations.
When you take this information and keep in mind that it’s not what you say, but the fact that you say something (blog: Starting a Conversation: Just Say Something), there’s no reason not to strike up your next conversation.
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, interpersonal skills
Posted in Conversations, Uncategorized, communication, communication skills, conversation starters, interpersonal skills | 7 Comments »
Friday, May 7th, 2010
Listening has been noted by executives to be more important than any other talent, including technical competence, computer knowledge, administrative talent, and creativity.
Tags: communication, communication skills, first impressions, good listener, interpersonal skills
Posted in communication, communication skills, interpersonal skills, interviews, listening | No Comments »
Thursday, May 6th, 2010
I recently discovered that we send specific messages when we nod our head during conversations:
- Don’t nod at all = disagree, confused or disinterested
- Single nod = agreement
- Repeated smaller and slower nods = general understanding and encourage others to elaborate
- Repeated faster nods = understand, agree and want to interrupt
So when your friend’s nodding quickly at you, they’re trying to tell you they get it, wrap it up, it’s their turn to talk.
Source: Conversationally Speaking by Alan Garner
Tags: communication skills, conversation starters, first impressions, interpersonal skills, nonverbal communication
Posted in Conversations, communication, communication skills, interpersonal skills | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, April 27th, 2010
I will be leading the above workshop at the Regional Economic Development Trade Summit 2010 on May 5 in Cleveland, Ohio. Here’s the preview:
In order to run a successful business, a woman needs to know how to communicate effectively, ask for the sale, negotiate deals, make a positive first impression, develop relationships, promote her company and herself, give presentations, and many other communication-related skills.
- Be more aware of their first impression and how to improve it
- Tips for their handshake, eye contact, and other details during introductions
- Be aware of nonverbal cues and what their body is saying
- A few rules to successfully start a conversation with anyone
- Tips for networking
- Examples of conversation starters as well as transitions and conversation enders
- Tips for communicating within social media: blogging, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter
- Tips for e-mail communication
- Tips for giving public presentations
Tags: communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, entrepreneur, first impressions, interpersonal skills, Penny Stones
Posted in Conversations, communication, communication skills, conversation starters, entrepreneur, interpersonal skills | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, April 14th, 2010
While many people struggle to find the “perfect” opener, research has shown that what you say is relatively insignificant. The important thing is to say something instead of letting an opportunity pass you by. If the other person is interested, they’re likely to help you continue the conversation.
According to Alan Garner, author of Conversationally Speaking, there are really only three topics to choose from:
1. The situation
2. The other person
3. Yourself
And three ways to start:
1. Asking a question
2. Giving an opinion
3. Stating a fact
Asking a question gets the other person involved, so that’s the best option. Find something to say that you will both be interested in, either about the situation or them. People like to talk about themselves and will be pleased to respond to your questions or comments. So when in doubt, ask an ordinary question about the other person. Once you start talking, you’ll find common interests and get the conversation going.
So the next time you see someone you’d like to meet, strike up a conversation. And don’t worry too much about what you say. Remember that the act of saying something is more important than the words themselves.
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation starters, first impressions, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills, topics
Posted in Conversations, Small Talk, communication, communication skills, conversation starters, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills | 6 Comments »
