Penny Stones Blog
Posts Tagged ‘listening skills’
Friday, June 4th, 2010
My daughter came home with this great little sheet on communication skills: Seven Blocks to Communication
Here are seven things NOT to do when you want to communicate well. They block communication in a number of ways. They prove that you are not listening.
- Fidget. Play with your hair and clothes, twiddle your fingers, swing your leg or tap your foot.
- Don’t look at your partner. Look around the room, at the clock, or anywhere else. Don’t have eye contact with your partner.
- Interrupt. Ever time your partner starts talking, break in with a question or statement.
- Ask questions. Lots of them. Every time your partner starts talking, ask a questions, such as, “Why did you do that?” or “Why do you feel that way?”
- Criticize. Tell your partner all the tings that are wrong with his or her ideas, clothes, hairs, friends.
- Disagree. Every time your partner says something, disagree. Tell your partner that he or she is wrong.
- Give advice. Every time your partner starts talking, make a suggestion. Pretend to know a lot more than your partner does.
Tags: children, communication, communication skills, conversation, first impressions, good listener, interpersonal skills, listening skills
Posted in Conversations, communication skills, interpersonal skills, listening | 1 Comment »
Friday, February 19th, 2010
You only have about 10 seconds to make a good first impression. And one of the best things you can do is to make the other person feel like they are the center of the conversation. Ask them open-ended questions. Let them know you’re listening with subtle clues: use eye contact, nod your head, chime in with “Interesting!”, “I see.” or “Tell me more.”
When they ask you a question, keep your response to three sentences. If they’re interested in hearing more, they’ll ask a question. Otherwise, start another topic or ask them another question.
In a situation where there are many people to meet, keep your focus on the person you are talking to and then transition politely. You can quickly change your good impression to bad if you start looking around the room for the “next/better” person to meet.
If you listen and show that you care about the people you meet, they’ll want to introduce you to their friends. They’ll look forward to seeing you again. And isn’t that what making a good impression is all about?
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, good listener, interpersonal skills, listening, listening skills, relationships
Posted in Conversations, Small Talk, communication, communication skills, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills, interviews, listening | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, October 20th, 2009
“Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend’s success.”- Oscar Wilde
Tags: communication, conversation, family, friendship, friendship quotes, kids, listening, listening skills, moms, parenting, Quotes, relationships, success
Posted in Conversations, Quotes, friendship, kids, parenting, relationships | 8 Comments »
Saturday, October 3rd, 2009
Talking is easy and we often take the skills of conversation for granted. But what’s involved in being a good listener? Active listening skills involve:
- Paying attention without distractions and maintaining eye contact
- Reflecting what is heard (This involves using similar words to express back to the speaker what was understood about the content of the message.)
- Showing empathy by identifying with the other’s feelings
- Listening with an open mind in order to understand another person’s point of view
From the Spring 2009 Penny Stones newsletter
Tags: communication, conversation, family, good listener, interviews, listening, listening skills
Posted in Conversations, Small Talk, ice breakers, icebreakers, interviews, kids, parenting, relationships, support groups, supports groups | No Comments »
Thursday, October 1st, 2009
I was clicking around the blog world and happened upon this neat little list of conversation starters in the Dream Dinner Blog
“If your family is like ours, you may work hard to create a family dinner time routine, or other family activity (”forced family fun” as our oldest calls it), and then realize that you are not sure what to talk about. There are many resources in print and on the internet that have conversation starters for families.
Here are few:
- What is one thing you couldn’t live without?
- What cartoon character would you most like to be? Why?
- What is the hardest/best thing about being ___ years old?
- Describe your all-time best day ever.
- What would be the worst job/profession to have?
- What should a parent do when a child doesn’t listen?
- Where would be the best place in the whole world to take a family vacation?
- Would you rather dive off a huge cliff, or give a book report in front of the whole school?
Even if these don’t spark a lengthy conversation, they will at least get the group started. It is important that each family gets a turn to talk without fear of interruption. Don’t worry if every child isn’t old enough to participate. The language stimulation for the little ones will be wonderful! Don’t forget to have the adults answer also! It may be necessary to start a rule that no one is allow to make fun of someone else’s answer. That way there is a feeling of safety for everyone to speak, whether they are two or fifty two. You may be surprised by some of the things you hear your children say!” Post from Dream Dinners blog
Tags: children, communication, communication skills, conversation, conversation starters, family, family relationships, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills, kids, listening, listening skills, parenting, relationships, talk
Posted in Conversations, children, communication skills, conversation starters, family, family relationships, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills, kids, parenting | 12 Comments »
Wednesday, September 30th, 2009
“Good communication skills and techniques are mostly the result of learned behavior. The examples we are given as children at home, at school and with our friends has a great deal to do with how we develop in this area. Generally, and in simplest terms, the better those around us communicate as we are growing up, the better the skills we develop. Because we have very little control over that when we’re young, we are not all on equal footing starting out. Luckily, it’s never too late to make improvements (nor is it too late to forward this blog to your parents, who might benefit from it as well!).” – from Stephanie Silverman’s Blog, click here to see the whole article.
Tags: communication, communication skills, conversation, family, family relationships, interpersonal skills, kids, listening skills, parenting, relationships
Posted in Conversations, Quotes, communication skills, conversation starters, family, family relationships, ice breakers, icebreakers, interpersonal skills, kids, parenting, relationships | 6 Comments »
Monday, September 28th, 2009
Today is a relatively new holiday: Family Day – A Day to Eat Dinner with Your ChildrenTM. It is a national movement to inform parents that the parental engagement fostered during frequent family dinners is an effective tool to help keep America’s kids substance free. Family Day reminds parents that Dinner Makes A Difference!
It started in 2001 as a grass roots movement and has grown to become a nationwide celebration. In fact, in 2008 President Bush, all 50 Governors and more than 800 Mayors and County Executives proclaimed and supported Family Day!
Plan to spend tonight with your family, eating, talking and connecting around the dinner table.
Tags: communication, family, family relationships, kids, listening skills, parenting
Posted in Conversations, family, kids, parenting, relationships | No Comments »
Monday, September 21st, 2009
What percentage do you think the actual words count for in person-to-person communication?
a. about 50%
b. less than 5%
c. about 25%
d. over 75%
The answer is b, less than 5% of a person’s message is the actual words they say. So what makes up over 95%? According to communications research, it’s all the other variables going on around the words, especially the nonverbal communication: how close they stand (proxemics), eye contact, posture, body language, facial expressions, gestures, etc. The nonverbal communication is seen by most people as “more true” than the words.
I’ve explained this to my kids to help them understand that how they say something is often times more important than what they say, i.e. even though they said they were sorry to their sibling, the message they sent was that they were not sorry. Also, when there’s a misunderstanding, we try to ask, “What’s my point?” or “What am I trying to say?” to help insure that the message sent was the message received.
From the Spring 2009 Penny Stones Newsletter
Tags: children, communication, communication skills, family relationships, good listener, interpersonal skills, listening skills
Posted in Conversations, children, conversation starters, family, friends, kids, parenting, relationships | No Comments »
